round of applause for half a year:

i already know you hate what i’ve become.

i always hated what you were.
we examined one another,
for hours on end,
days at a time,
six months straight.
i’ve already forgotten your face.
hardly remember your name.
now any boy to give me the least bit of attention,
he catches my eye,
and i hold on for dear life:
it helps me to forget.
losing you isn’t so bad,
if i can lay with someone new
every night in my bed.
as long as you know i do,
and it breaks you down,
it creates a hole in your heart,
and you’re falling apart,
just as i am.
we’re hiding it the best we can
(not very well at all).
your cerulean eyes,
i swear they’ll be the death of me,
i see them in my dreams.
they pierce me like knives,
through my heart,
out the other side,
the blood runs down your walls.
i did all i could,
i changed all i was-
did i keep you happy?
did it keep you holding on?
you fell in love with who you made me,
never who i was.
i remember in the car,
sitting in silence.
when it ended,
the day the feelings changed.
not a word was sad,
you looked at me,
i saw it in your eyes.
i turned away,
we took opposite paths,
we never once looked back.
we were both always so good at that-
pretending it didn’t hurt.